I dare you to read the whole thing.

The cover of the current National Geographic we have is a picture of a gorilla with the words "Who Murdered the Mountain Gorilla?" I'm sure it's a sad, society sucks kind of article, pull at heartstrings, whatever. Every time I see it, though, all I can think is that video did it. Video killed the mountain gorilla.

I started watching Rudy last night (I had pulled it out on Saturday because my mom didn't believe us that Vince Vaughn is in it. I tried finding a youtube clip just now, but alas, no luck after a few minutes of searching). I do this thing where I watch like five or ten minutes of a movie in my room before I go to bed. Don't know why. And I can't watch just any movie, it has to be the right kind. (I just finished Sense and Sensibility the other day, after starting it last week.) Usually I write in my journal and it's just sort of background noise or something. (Look! I found a clip! It's taking forever to load on my laptop, but maybe that's just me.) Anyway. So I was watching Rudy. And I guess I must have watched more than ten minutes, because I got well into the part where he gets to South Bend. And when they showed the first scene with him walking around the lake, and then the Dome in the background, I just started crying. It was so sad. (Not the movie.) I love that place. Such a nice place. (I have lots better pictures of campus and the dome and all, but this is sorta like the shot from the movie where I started crying. Sort of.)


This may be a bit Too Much Information, but I'm semi worried about the cyst situation again. I stopped taking the pill after the last batch I had, because I didn't really feel like paying $50 for it (uninsured price), and my doctor had said I could probably stop a few months after last time I saw her. Technically that would mean I should still do another two months' worth, but...I'm not. And today I started feeling a tad bit like there's possibly another cyst coming. Obviously I'm not sure, and it's not like it's really bad or even moderately bad or anything, so I'll just have to wait and see right now. But man, man man I hope I'm overreacting. I really don't want to have to deal with that again or anymore. I think there's a fairly good chance I'm overreacting. But you never know. I guess I just gotta pray that cysts stay far, far away from me. (And hey, you can too!)

So, in my Notre Dame email account (which I suppose will get discontinued one of these days; that's what they tell us, anyway, although they have yet to say when that'll happen), I have -- get ready -- 103 pages of emails (20 emails per page, I believe), and a total of 2050 emails. Amassed over four years of college. I never liked having people at school see my inbox because I'm pretty sure most everyone else had quite a smaller number than that. I'd say a majority of the emails are ones that I could delete and probably would have, but I wanted to keep them because they were relevant for a few days and then I would just forget to go back and delete them later on. And at this point, the thought of going through 2050 emails to figure out which ones I should keep (and I guess, if I want to keep them, email them to another of my accounts or something?) is just completely overwhelming. Chances are there aren't really any that I care about keeping, really. It's just another thing to be pack-ratty about, keeping anything and everything that might have the tiniest bit of sentimental value (but really has none). So in the end I'm sure I'll just lose them all whenever they realize I'm not a student anymore. Oh well.

I really, really, really want to go back to DC sometime (probably during some warmer weather months) and do more than a day's worth of sightseeing. Because a day is definitely not enough for DC. I think I could easily spend a month there looking at all the sweet sweet historical things and whatnot. Man. Next time I take a vacation, that's where I want to go. (For the record, I think the last actual "vacation" I took was a trip out to California with my family. I believe that was...after 7th grade? Maybe after 8th. I never can remember. All our other trips have almost always been to go visit family on the east coast. Occasionally included things like sightseeing New York City, DC (for like half a day), and going to Disneyworld, but all three of those may have been the same trip, and that trip took place when I was seven. So who knows when I'll take an actual vacation again.)

I came across this quote today:
In time of trial it is of great profit to us patiently to endure for God's sake, for the Lord says: "By patient endurance you will win life for yourselves." He did not say by your fasting, or your solitude or silence, or your singing of psalms....This is the queen of virtues, the foundation of virtue, a haven of tranquility. It is peace in time of war, calm in rough waters, safety amidst treachery and danger. It makes those who practice it stronger than steel. No weapons or brandished bows, no turbulent troops or advancing siege engines, no flying spears or arrows can shake it. Not even the host of evil spirits, nor the dark array of hostile powers, nor the devil himself standing by with all his armies and devices will have power to injure the man or woman who has acquired this virtue through Christ. ~~St. Nilus
No, I haven't ever heard of this saint. (Yet, according to the Patron Saint Index, there are four or five St. Niluses (Nili? haha). Weird.) Anyway, patience is good, and something I desperately need to work on. And it's so hard to work on, too, because...you get impatient when it doesn't happen right away. Whatever it is.

Came across this today: Cohabiting is bad. Now, I believe this, but the thing about the article is I'd have a tough time convincing anyone who previously disagreed if I quoted this article. It's too "biased" and "agenda-driven." Because we all know that if you happen to believe a certain thing, and then a study you (or someone you'd probably agree with) shows that certain thing seems to be true, the study is automatically unusable because it's just too biased. Whatever. I know what's true, even if other people don't want to see it. (And no, I'm not saying that everyone who cohabits is a terrible person, or that all of them will result in failed marriages/relationships, but still. It's not a good thing. I think I'd even say it's never a good thing.) Anyway. Marriage is in a terrible state these days. I went to a Theology of the Body talk on Friday night, and I didn't hear anything earth-shattering that I didn't already know, but man. How do people not see it? I heard a thing today that said that kids whose fathers are involved in their schools (I was confused as to whether it was the actual school, like PTA or whatnot, or schoolwork) do far and away better than those who don't. I forget the exact numbers, but I think one was that kids whose fathers aren't involved are twice as likely to repeat a grade. Fathers are important. Families are important. Intact, original families. With the original, non-divorced parents. I just don't understand how people can't see the truth in the statement "As the family goes, so goes the nation and so goes the whole world." JP II said that. He was pretty smart. I mean, look at the poorest, worst-off sections of the country. Are they places where families and marriages thrive? I'm pretty sure not. And I'm pretty sure there's a correlation there.

Anyway. Sorry. I can tend to rant about that stuff. It's sort of my pet peeve, or whatever you want to call it. Not a peeve really. Pet...subject? Eh whatever. That's what it is. But I'm sure you all knew that.

Um...what other random topic can I come up with?...Well, Hazel's been biting more lately, it seems. We really need to break her of that. We've been kind of trying since we got her, but it just doesn't seem like it's taken hold of her yet. I haven't tried what the trainer at puppy class suggested. I might have to though. (The only thing is, it involves me doing something that I think would make me feel somewhat silly. But if it gets the job done, and preferably if no one's watching, it's worth it. Biting isn't a good thing.)

4th of July is Friday. Three day weekend! And fireworks! And the symphony, oh the symphony. How I love them. I hope I can go to a concert or two this year. I've missed that. I'm still sad about the year my parents got me season tickets (or, partial season tickets) during junior year of high school, and I think I went to two or three of the six, and halfway through they declared bankruptcy and canceled the rest of the shows. That was so depressing. I was very looking forward to some of the remaining ones that I never got to see (I mean, looking forward to all, but a few in particular). It was so sad. Anyway. It's a good time, the symphony (I think when they came back, they were called the philharmonic. I just never use that). I adore listening to orchestral music. Perhaps I'm biased, but that doesn't mean it's not good. It always makes me miss being in orchestra, but at the same time, it's never the same being in the orchestra as listening to it -- when you're playing, you can't experience it in the same way because you're so focused on your own part while listening to make sure you're fitting in with the rest. When you're just listening, you can hear everything working in lovely harmony in a different way. I mean, they're both great, but just listening is nice. (It would be cool, though, to be that good and be able to say you produced something that beautiful.) Hm. I just thought of something. When I'm singing along to a song on the radio or wherever, I tend to want to go with the harmony rather than the melody. I wonder if that has anything to do with the fact that I typically played second violin (more harmony than melody). And by typically, I'm pretty sure I mean always...Hey, I didn't start until 8th grade, ok? I was pretty good, considering (I would have probably been great if I had been in the lower orchestra instead of the better one. Luckily for me, the lower one didn't fit in my schedule freshman year, and my teacher let me move to the upper one even though I wasn't that great). Most people who were in orchestra in high school had started in like fourth grade (or earlier). Apparently that's one of the perks of going to real elementary school as opposed to homeschool -- they force you to learn an instrument or something. Although, to be fair, I did play piano for a bit when I was around that age. With a teacher who routinely made me cry during lessons. Aw, poor me.

Gosh that was a long, rambling paragraph. Sorry about that. I'm in a type-y mood tonight. Oooh guess what else I get to do on the 4th? Watch 1776! We always watch it on the fourth, and not any other day of the year. It's a great movie, and I highly recommend it (even if it is a musical and lots of people don't like musicals). Very entertaining. And I mean, come on, it's got Mr. Pheeney in it! I love 4th of July (except, somehow it usually ends up being at least somewhat disappointing. That's what happens when you look forward to things).

Man, so my mom reminded me at 9:30 that I was going to do my laundry tonight (I meant to do it this weekend and didn't ever get to it). I suppose considering the time it is now I could have done a load, but ugh. I hope I have clothes to wear tomorrow. I think the only problem is that my pants might be wrinkled...since I was planning to wash them all tonight...and I don't know if I have any more clean trouser socks (basically thicker knee highs). Oh well. I think I was considering wearing a skirt tomorrow anyway. Maybe.

I hope I see Wall-E sometime soon. I've heard almost nothing but good things. Not surprising considering it's Pixar. Their movies almost always look uninteresting to me, and then I finally see them and end up loving them. Go figure.

Well I think that's more than enough for tonight. How am I supposed to label this post? Or title it?

Church & stuff

Church today was surprisingly good, considering I'm still going to Holy Apostles this week. Hate to say it, but I almost wonder if part of the reason was because I went by myself since my parents were going to this conference thingy in the afternoon and evening, which includes Mass. I really do like going to Mass by myself. It's what I did most of the time at school, so I'm just so used to it. Anyway, the music was the music (although they did do the Litany of the Saints during offertory or something like that, and while it was just the usual Holy Apostles version, it wasn't terrible), and there was definitely prominent guitar during at least one of the songs (boy do I miss organ music), but whatever. Nothing more than expected. The homily was pretty good though, and that's sort of an important thing, so all in all not terrible. Oh, except, annoying (but not at all surprising, to say the least) -- not a single mention of the fact that last night was the official start of the Jubilee Year of St. Paul. It's slightly a big deal, in case you weren't aware (and chances are, even if you're Catholic, you weren't aware because even the USCCB website doesn't have a single mention of it on the front page. They do have a small section for it, but no links to it from the home page. It's ridiculous. Jubilee Years are sort of a big deal. Since the first in 1300, there have been a total of 29 now, including this one. My church didn't mention it (although, thankfully, the whole Mass was centered around the solemnity of Sts. Peter and Paul, which is today's feast day), our diocesan website seems to have nothing about it, and not even the USCCB has anything. (At least the Vatican page does. But it'd be kind of terrible if they didn't.)

Ok rant about that over.

I really need to work on my relationship with God. In a bad way. Even though I don't ever really talk to or interact with people I go to Mass with (I mean, like my parents or family or whoever) aside from sign of peace and whatnot, I think I'm a lot less distracted somehow when I go alone. I mean, there's very little difference in going with my parents and going by myself, but it's just less distracting. Anyway though. I got some recommendations today for what might be some more traditional Masses that might make me a bit happier, so I might try one or two of them out in the coming weeks. (One of them is, surprisingly, the Catholic chapel at the Air Force Academy. I would never think to go there.) We shall see. I think I'm pretty stagnant where I am right now until I get thinks moving with God again. I just seem to have so little energy to do the things I need to do the most (that, getting in shape, cleaning my room, etc). I guess it's hard when I'm working all day, get home and start to decompress and then eat dinner, and by the time that's all done it's usually almost if not past seven, and then I only have a few hours before I should be going to bed (but then I don't get to bed when I should so I'm tired the next day and thus have even less energy or motivation to do anything). Yeah, whine whine, it's no excuse. It's all my fault, too, and I know that.

Maybe one of these days I'll start getting things under control. Maybe.

Well worth the wait

Ok, so the last movie I saw in the theaters was 27 Dresses. Sad, yes. That was back in like January. And it was 27 Dresses. (Ok, I did see National Treasure 2 at the end of April or early May, but for some reason I don't really count that because it was the dollar theater and was practically out on DVD by that point, and...yeah...whatever. That was a good movie too, though.) Anyway. Today I found out that my brother (Tom), and sister in law (Peter's wife Sara, obviously, yeah) were going to see Kung Fu Panda tonight since they both wanted to see it and neither had other people who wanted to see it, and Tom was coming down today for Jimmy's birthday (he's one now!). So I went along too, even though I wasn't very excited about it at all. Hadn't even really seen any trailers for it, actually, so I didn't have much of an idea what it was about.

But dude. That movie is hilarious. I mean, it was almost worth admission for the first five minutes alone. I haven't been so consistently entertained by a movie in a long time. Seriously, it was the epitome of awesomeness. I highly, highly recommend it if you have the chance to see it. (Although, I think I may have a sense of humor that some people don't have, so it might not be for everyone. But Sara and Tom were both highly amused as well, so who knows.) I laughed a lot. (And it wasn't the kind of laughter that I had to hold back when I saw Atonement. That laughter was more of the "Oh my gosh I can't believe I'm sitting here watching this terrible, terrible movie. I can't believe this movie is critically acclaimed and that people actually like it" sort. Definitely not my cup of tea.) But Kung Fu Panda? Highly entertaining. In a good way. And not a bad soundtrack, either.

(Also, did you know that they made a movie based on the story of one of the American Girl dolls? Apparently it comes out July 2. I had not heard of it until tonight. Looks like it could be good, but I'm slightly annoyed that the first American Girl doll movie that they make is one of the not original five that I'm acquainted with. Those five being Kirsten, Felicity, Molly, Samantha, and...um...ok, upon further research, apparently there were three originals (Kirsten, Molly, and Samantha, and Felicity was added in 1991, then Addy in 93. I guess Addy was probably just shortly after I started getting into that whole thing, but any others added after that I thought were stupid). I had Kirsten, fyi. Quite enjoyable. I always wanted to have the furniture and everything, but I think I mostly just had the one doll and the stuff she came with. None of the extras. I would have liked having any of those others, in addition, but yeah. And after some more reading, apparently they did made-for-TV-movies about Samantha, Felicity, and Molly. So I guess I just know nothing. But aw, those were fun times playing with those dolls. It's a pretty great idea, really. Especially for someone who loves learning about history, as I always have.)

(Also, apparently they made a movie coming out in December based on the book Marley & Me. I hadn't heard about this book until I got Hazel and was reading stuff online about Australian Cattle Dogs and whatnot, and it came up somewhere. So now I'm thinking I should read it, because I've heard good things, and the movie looks good. And also like a book/movie that will undoubtedly make me cry.)

And that's all I have to say about that.

Oh, except this: Kung Fu Panda rocks.

Skidoosh.

Vita est bona

(I miss Latin.)

Oh boy oh boy oh boy!

I used my sweet sweet discount at work today for the first time. I bought three things. I had been planning on buying July's Magnificat, which I'm very excited about (one of these days I'll get around to getting myself a subscription. I really need some help with my prayer life, and I think structured prayer like that is the way to do it. Someday, hopefully sooner than later, I'll be getting the Liturgy of the Hours. Excited for that day), so I got that. And then I wanted to get one of the books from the Summer Reading Program list, and to go along with that prayer thing, I got "Time For God," which yes, is next to last on the list. I've heard good things about it though. So there's that. And then today, randomly, I remembered this book that I had wanted to get awhile back and never did (of course), and as it's a Catholic book by a Catholic author about a Catholic saint, I figured I should check to see if we had it! And lo and behold, we did, and it was in stock! So, I bought it as well. What is it? Why, it's Helena by Evelyn Waugh! I'm uber-excited. Yay for me!

Also, today I had great success with sitting on my ball. Worked on my posture. Bounced around. It was a good time. Everyone thinks that I'm brilliant (ok, perhaps not. But quite a few have mentioned it'd be fun at least to try...). Seriously though, heck yes. I mean, it's impossible not to have a great day when you have a chair that bounces and rolls around and is awesome! Sorta like that line in that song, "You can't dance and stay uptight, it's supernatural delight." Pretty much the same concept there. Haha. Anyway. Good times.

Also? I'm very excited for Batman. Oh man you'd better believe it.

Jimmy turns one tomorrow. Crazy.

Driving home tonight, I noticed that a light going one direction of an intersection I rarely pass (going that direction at least) now has three -- count 'em, three -- left turn lanes/arrows. Three. I don't know if I've ever seen that before. It's bizarre. I mean, I guess to have that you need to be turning onto a street with three lanes, and a majority have two (each way), but yeah. Weird. Also weird, ever since I got back here, I've realized that more and more lights on fairly frequented intersections are now on a cycle where all of one side goes, including the left turners, then left turn gets the red arrow, the other side going straight can go, then eventually the first side going straight gets a red light and the other side turning left can go. And then they get the red arrow at the same time as their side going straight. There were a few lights in town that have been doing this for awhile, but now it's a lot of them. It's weird. I wonder why so many are doing that now. (And I also wonder why so many people think it's appropriate and ok to run a red arrow completely and blatantly. Seriously. It's bad. It's like people still turn left even though they arrow has already turned red, and the other side going straight now has a green light. This happens ALL. THE. TIME. And no one ever gets pulled over for it. Probably hence why it's so rampant. Boo.)

I need sleep.

Sometimes, even I can't get me down

I am so so so in love. My puppy Hazel makes me incredibly happy. I just can't get over it. And I'm pretty sure that even posting pictures on here won't really show just how cute she is to me, because no one else can see her the way I see her. Even though on occasion she's a bit rambunctious and won't listen (particularly when she's doing something like digging, or when she gets really hyper), she makes my heart sing. Sounds silly, I know, but it's so true. And I'm sure that I would be feeling this about any puppy I might have gotten, but she's the one I got, and I couldn't love her more. Just a few minutes ago, she jumped up onto the couch (which she's not really supposed to do...but I suppose we're not doing a great job of discouraging it. She only just got big enough to get up there within the last few days). And then she jumped up so her paws were at the top, looking over it to where I am (facing the back of the couch). I went over to the couch, supposedly to tell her to get down, and she had laid down and was about to start biting it when she sort of just fell off the side. It was quite funny. Anyway. I'll stop talking about her now. (It's really pretty hard. She's just so cute!)

Work is going so great lately. I mean, I don't know what they're thinking about my performance, and I'm still learning things little by little, but we're at the start of the first full campaign that I've been working on (the Pauline Year, which starts on Saturday! Bet you've never heard of the Pauline Year, have you? Look it up. It's a good time), and yeah. I'm so loving this job. I don't know how I got so lucky as to get it, or how I get paid to do it. Great stuff.

I went to Bible study tonight, and man, what a great group of people. Really. Lots of fun. Maybe I'm making myself be in sort of a Catholic bubble, but I love that so many aspects of my life are so richly Catholic. Catholics are pretty cool, in my opinion. We can have fun too, you know. Tomorrow night I'm going to a talk on Theology of the Body that's sponsored by the group. I'm excited about that. We all know I kinda like Theology of the Body. And Sunday I'm going to a brunch that's girls-only at one of the girl's house from the group. Should be fun. And completely separate but speaking of friends, Lauren's coming home this weekend! I'm so excited. As I think I mentioned yesterday...

Speaking of Catholic things: Pope prefers Communion on the tongue. I think it'd be awesome if we went back to receiving on the tongue, kneeling. So often when I'm at Mass, during Communion it seems just like a free-for-all "everyone rush up to the altar but get it done quick!" sort of thing. I think it'd be good for everyone if it were a tad more reverent (I know, more reverent? Is that even possible, Susie?) and took a bit longer. It's easy to forget just what an amazing and huge thing is happening when Communion happens like it typically does in 95% of American churches. If people were forced to take the time to wait, kneel down, and place themselves in the position of having to let the priest put the Body directly on their tongues, they might be reminded how powerful it really is. Anyway. There's my little rant thing for the night.

Oh speaking of work (a few paragraphs ago), I finally took my ball into work today. My big ol' exercise ball that I used at my desk in my room sophomore and senior years. I had just gotten so sick of the computer chair I had there. I mean, I'm sure it's a great chair, and it's comfortable. But I could just feel how slouchy I was getting all the time, sitting in it for 8 hours a day, all that jazz. Not a good thing. So hopefully the ball will help. Only thing is, I haven't sat on it for the better part of two months (and even then, towards the end of the year I was sitting at my desk at school so rarely when I was in my room). And even then, I never sit in it for that long at a time. So...it's gonna take some getting used to, sort of get in shape for it. It does almost feel like I did a workout today. (And yes, that is sad.) So yeah. I expected to get some comments about it, but I think everyone knows I'm right. Haha. I'll convert the whole office, just you wait.

Tomorrow is my turn to clean the office (vacuum, clean the bathroom, etc). So I'm going in early. Bleh. But I'd rather do that (I think) than stay late. So on that note, I must to bed.

Vignettes...but not even really that

I feel like such a slacker Catholic because I've never been to Rome. Sigh. I so want to go to Italy. I'll go on my honeymoon when I marry that rich guy I'm going to marry. (Ha to so many parts of that sentence.)

I think my whole group of school friends (those of us who were Backer regulars or semi-regulars) are really missing the Backer lately. I was really missing it today, and the fun times, and then talking to a friend tonight she agreed, and she said another of our friends was listening to his Backer mix at work. Sigh. Growing up. Who needs it.

I just came across this article. Some 61 year old guy who's apparently a semi-celebrity at...University of Kansas (and the city where it's located) is marrying a 22 year old junior there. And according to the article, they knew each other all of a month before getting engaged. Now, ok, maybe she's desperate (I understand all about that), but come on, have some standards. Twice divorced, probably at least one of his two sons is older than his new fiancee, and...61! Ok, sure, maybe they really love each other. Who am I to say they don't. But can anyone read that and have their first initial reaction not be "Ickkkkk" or something similar? It's just...weird. It's possible it's some fake article, since you never can tell. But man. That's weird and creepy. Honestly, what can a 61 year old man and 22 year old woman have in common? Or at least, have in common enough to get married? Whatever. To each his/her own, I guess. (At least it's not based on sex. But that was probably a given even if the article hadn't expressly said it. Haha. Sorry.)

So, I'm going to the first Air Force game on August 29 or 30 or whatever date that Saturday is. My cousin is starting at the Air Force this year (goes to boot camp tomorrow, actually), and that first weekend is Parents Weekend, so my aunt and uncle and other cousin are coming out here and got tickets to that game for my parents and me. I'm pretty excited, because I miss football games. And the best part is Notre Dame doesn't have a game until the next week, so I won't be missing one. Yay me.

I still miss Kebbie. And Colt. Hazel could never take their places in my heart. But she sure does help the rest of my heart.

Speaking of her, I was going to upload pictures tonight. And my laptop's actually cooperated with me for almost three hours now (maybe closer to 2). But I didn't want to do it on here because I didn't know how the laptop would take it, and then I just didn't go over to my parents' computer to do it, so I didn't do it at all. Alas. Perhaps I'll get to it by the weekend. Who knows. Not like anyone here cares anyway. (There's a surprisingly good picture of me on my camera, though, my friend Cathy and I, when we went mini golfing with the young adult group last week. It's time for a new Facebook picture, and I have so few good recent pictures of me. So I want to get that one too. But not tonight.)

Also: I need to learn how to be more content with things. Especially certain aspects of my life with which I am not content in the slightest. But it's hard, did you know? Especially hard to think that God probably has me where I am for a reason, and yet I hate it, but how can I say that he's wrong? Trusting God is a tricky, tricky thing that I'm no good at. oh well. Maybe someday I'll get there. I'm sure I'll have a lot of time to try.

Lastly, my friend Lauren comes home to me on Friday. Not sure when I'll get to see her, as I'm going to a Theology of the Body talk Friday night, and then Saturday afternoon I have puppy class and it's Jimmy's 1st birthday (wow, he's a year -- and also, man, he's only been around for a year?), and Sunday morning I'm doing a brunch thing...but maybe Sunday afternoon. I miss her so much. I've seen her probably 5 days total in the last year, year and a half or so. Not very frequently. Which is sad, because she's so much fun. But she'll be around for a month (maybe a bit more, I'm not entirely sure when she goes back to school, but it's definitely early August), so I'm uber excited about that. Especially since maybe now I'll have someone to go see Batman with who's actually also excited about it! (At least...I think she is. Hm maybe she's not though. I hope she is. I need someone to see it with!)

Ah, I've just remembered that I haven't yet finished the questions for Bible study tomorrow night. And it's 10:30, which should be way past my bedtime (but in reality isn't). So I best get to that.

I have dreams about doing this to my laptop

Ok I was going to post a youtube video that's a clip from Office Space, the part where the three guys take that copier or whatever it is to an open field and kick it, take a bat to it, and basically mutilate the thing. But then I turned up the sound on the computer (I had just watched it with no sound the first time), and realized that the song that's played during that clip has quite a bit of objectionable language. So I decided perhaps it's best not to put that on here, as I'd like this blog to be fairly family-friendly. Or at least offensive language-free. But for anyone who doesn't care about that stuff, by all means go check out the clip. (And if you do care about that stuff, but like the clip or want to see it, hey, just turn off the sound. It's even more enjoyable that way. Maybe.)

Back to the main point. Man. It'd be so nice to do that to my laptop. I just am getting so frustrated by it now. Tonight, after having it off allll day, since last night at 11 or so, I turned it on and I didn't even get probably more than ten minutes out of it. No, it was definitely even less than that. Maybe ten total if you include the few times I got it to restart and actually take, until the next time it shut down two minutes later. Ugh. (Oh, I just remembered, to be fair -- I did turn it on at around 7 and had it on for a little while, and then we went to Cold Stone and came back around 8:30, and then it started its whole BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH/freezing routine.) But yeah. I can't wait to have a laptop on which I can watch youtube (or any other kind of) videos, and visit website without fear of it causing my computer to die, and listen to music, and heck maybe even be fairly wireless with it (not have to be hooked up to the AC adapter the whole time). It'll be so nice to have all that again. That's the thing about the Acer laptop I saw last night -- its battery life didn't seem to be so long. Looked like it was 2 hours at most. I guess that's a lot when I'm used to having no battery life. But anyway. Hopefully by this time two weeks from now (if not less), I'll be writing on a brand-spanking new laptop. How exciting! (Except for the money part of the whole deal...)

For the record, though, much as I might hate my laptop at this point, I don't think I'd ever really be able to beat it up like that. Although I have been quite tempted lately just to throw it against the wall or something. I can't do it yet, though, because I still haven't put my stuff onto my parents' external hard drive. My stuff mostly just includes papers I wrote, my music, and my pictures. But still. (Argh I hate this keyboard.)

Anyway. It's 10pm, and I'm exhausted. I'll be heading up to bed soon, and I mean that this time. Work's great, but my ongoing tendency to be practically falling asleep at my desk on and off during the days is seriously starting to get on my nerves. Waking up at 6:30 is hard. Especially when there's no opportunity for a nap at any point during the day. But I'm fairly gainfully employed, and at a place I absolutely love, so I can't complain. (Speaking of which -- did you know that Aquinas and More does not sell anything made or printed in China? People might say they're boycotting the Olympics because of all the atrocities caused by the Chinese government, but then they go to Walmart where it's hard to find things not made in China, and don't bat an eye. We don't want our products to contribute to anything that goes on in China, though. I highly recommend checking out Aquinas and More if you ever need anything Catholic-related. Won't find a better selection anywhere else online, that's for sure.)

I also love my puppy. Dangit, I should have uploaded pictures tonight. Oh well. She's so cute. So small. So fun. Thoroughly a part of the family, even if she is a bit less behaved than we'd like. But then, she's only 12 weeks, and we've only had her for 3.5 weeks (wow, it's only been 3 weeks?), and we just started puppy class, so I can't expect her to know everything right off the bat, right? She's so great though. And I love that she's still small enough to be a lap puppy right now. She'll get bigger, obviously, but for now I love picking her up and hugging her and carrying her around and putting her on my lap. She doesn't usually go along with it for more than a minute, if that, but sometimes she's in a cuddly mood and then it's lots of fun. She makes me so happy. Even if she never lets me hit snooze and sleep a little longer after my alarm.

With that in mind, bedtime.

The question now is...

Do I spend more money (maybe up to $700 or 800) for a potentially better product (but no guarantees, obviously), and probably a better name, or do I go cheaper (maybe around $500), thinking that I don't really need my new laptop to do a whole lot? It's so frustrating, this laptop selection thing. I just want there to be one great laptop, perfect price, exactly what I need, and I want someone to tell me that it's the perfect one and it'll be great for me -- fairly light, good battery life, ability to watch DVDs and listen to music and stay on for more than 5 minutes at a time, fine for Internet surfing, won't break down on me in six months, will be very hardy, etc. Is that so hard? There's too many to choose from, and too many are too similar for me to be able to tell which will be best for me. And then there's the fact that with practically every brand, someone says "Oh I hate them." Ok maybe not many people say that about Toshibas or Thinkpads. I'm leaning toward one of those two. Assuming I go with a probably better product over a cheaper price. (I randomly found this Acer Aspire 5315 online tonight for $499. But the fact that I know nothing about the brand, and yeah the fact that it is so fairly cheap, makes me sort of hesitant to pull the trigger.) Sigh. I'm never going to figure this out. Someone do it for me! I'm begging you! I can't take my laptop any longer (and this keyboard on my parents' computer? Terrible. Awful. I never have so many typos as I do when I'm typing here. Me no likey the typos)!

In other news, I'm sick to...whatever of jokes about how dumb Bush is. The radio station I listen to most often (106.3 -- lite rock) has had this commercial/giveaway promotion thing for most of the month since I've been back. It's a Bush impersonator talking about this $100,000 stimulus package giveaway something or other, and basically the whole thing is making fun of Bush and saying the economic situation is all his fault. Actually it directly says that. Now, ok, I know Bush isn't the greatest president, but I just heard that his disapproval rating is at 71%. Seriously? 71%? He's not that bad, people. I can't argue too much with some of the life/moral issues that have happened under his presidency (hey, at least some sort of ban got passed, right? Things could have gotten worse with another president). And I'm pretty sure the gas prices aren't really his fault. Now, I'll be the first to admit that I'm not all that up on all the political stuff. But I know enough not to attribute everything to Bush. Not to say I defend everything he's done. I'd rather have him than the alternative we were given the last two presidential elections. No question. (And boy oh boy would I take him over Obama in a heartbeat. A heartbeat that Obama would be all for silencing if it belongs to an unborn baby, or a baby that was attempted to be aborted but managed to survive.)

Speaking of radio stations, I just found out on the news tonight that the one Oldies station we had in town, which I recently realized had gone from being oldies to being some random conglomeration of maybe 70s and up, but only to probably mid-90s or so, is now on AM instead of FM. Slightly annoying because it's harder to switch from FM to AM when channel surfing than it is just to go between my preset FM stations. But I guess it's all just pushing a button a time or two. Anyway. We used to have two oldies stations on FM here. Then one went to random 80s, 90s, today kind of thing, and now the other one changed too (and that one broadcasts from Pueblo). Colorado Springs really needs to step up their stations. Pretty soon everything's going to be practically the same.

Also, today on my lunch break I flitted over to Target because I've been without a journal for almost two weeks now. I'd grown quite used to writing in my journal at least a few times a week, so I was getting sick of not having one. So I went to Target because it's close to work. And I needed a few other things that Target would have (like new mascara and eyeliner -- this morning I woke up with a pink eye symptomatic eye. Ok that made no sense. But it looked like pink eye, which I had been suspecting yesterday and maybe the day before. Yeah, I know, I don't know why on earth this happens to me so often, and maybe I overreact and attribute everything to pink eye that I might have previously just written off as nothing. Before all the fun pink eye experiences. But whether it is or not, I decided I just needed to get rid of everything just in case somehow there were germs on my eye makeup or something. And I won't be wearing the new stuff until my eye looks good for at least a few days). So after I had gotten the stuff I went for, I was about to head to the checkout when I decided to look at the cheap movies they had. Sometimes they have good older movies for $5. And indeed, I found two that looked good -- Stepmom and Sense and Sensibility. Sweet. But then the really bad part. Right in front of one of the checkout lanes, they had another section of $10 movies. And of course there were two there that I've been wanting to get. Sigh. So I got them. I'm so weak. (Although, in my defense, I probably buy movies three times a year. And they're almost always $10 or less.) National Treasure and The Holiday (which last night I had gotten a craving to watch. Even though anything having to do with romance is the last thing I need in my life right now). So...whatever.

Hazel is sweet and so so cute. I really should upload my pictures to my parents' computer just so I can get some more on here. I just love looking at her fur, seeing the pattern where it's tan instead of white, and her face. Oh, her face. Such a cute face I just can't even stand it! And her huge huge ears. They dominate her head. So cute.

K need to get to bed. (Didn't mean to write any more than the laptop thing. But it's me, so of course I wrote more.)

Another mundane non-event in the life of Susie

This past week especially, I've been so unmotivated at the thought of blowdrying my hair. Normally I don't particularly care all that much, but this week, man. It's been a chore. And the other day I realized why this might be (in addition to the fact that it's sort of hot lately. Not really hot, but hot enough that I don't like the idea of blowing hot air in my face for five minutes). I haven't gotten a hair cut since before spring break -- that's like four months. Ok not a really long time, but my hair's getting longer than I'm typically used to I guess. I mean I have gone longer than that without getting a haircut, but yeah. Maybe not in awhile. Either way, I think it's about time.

And that's my story.

It's sad and it's sweet and I knew it complete when I wore a younger man's clothes

Last night I was standing at the sink in the bathroom, getting ready to wash my face and brush my teeth and such before bed. I had the radio on, because I always do. Piano Man came on. At almost the exact time it started, perhaps a bit before, I suddenly got this flash of walking past Jordan Hall of Science (between it and the JACC), like I was walking to TC or something, in the evening or night (it was dark). Anyway, it was a very random flash, and it's not like walking past there was ever a particularly meaningful time or anything (and I definitely don't think I ever did it at night, by myself, walking toward TC), but the thing I realized is that I don't even have that option anymore. Except for the times I go out to visit, and who knows when that'll be, I'm not going to be able to experience that stuff anymore. Anyway. All this flashed through my head in about .27 seconds, and I started to cry.* Not sure if Piano Man contributed, but I'm sure it did at least keep my tears going. It's an ND song for me, because they play it at the end of all the dances and such, and it's just one of those songs that you hear a lot if you go there.

Man. I miss that place. I can't believe I won't be going back in August. (That thought is both good and bad. It's nice to talk about things that are going to be happening here, both in the Springs and with my family, in September and October and such and realize that I'll be here for it. But that also means no more ND. No more ND friends. Etc.) I would absolutely love to be able to go back for the first game. The likelihood of getting tickets is slim, but I know of at least three of my friends (three of the four who I spent the most time with, the fourth being Bethany who I think will definitely not be at any games this season...I think) who will be there for that one. Julie's going, and she doesn't have a ticket as of yet (as far as I know), but she's going because people will be there and she can still do everything else, and just watch the game at the Backer or somewhere. Of course, she's in Chicago, and it's much easier and cheaper to get to South Bend from Chicago than from Colorado...Sigh. Oh well. Someday I'll be back.


*I must admit that I was already in a crying mood when this happened because of something else, something that's really been messing with my head lately. And I had in fact been crying like thirty seconds earlier, but had managed to get it under control. For a minute, anyway. Eh I'm pathetic. Whatever.

A great big handbasket, people.

Just because people say they're against gay marriage because it reduces marriage itself does not mean that those people ignore the fact that divorces reduce marriage as well. It is quite possible to realize that both harm marriages, and that divorces are terrible things to be discouraged as well.

Oh, and as my dad often points out, it's ridiculous to compare the ban on gay marriage to the illegality of interracial marriage back in the day. They are not the same thing. People could get arrested, go to jail for getting married interracially (or attempting to) back then. I'm pretty sure no one has arrested gay couples who go have some nice little ceremony and say they're married. It's not illegal. It's just not recognized by the state.

Eh what's the point. We're going to kill ourselves as a society sooner or later. Definitely headed there.

Day 1

Last night I decided it's time I start taking Hazel out regularly on a walk. So I set my alarm for 6:01 (!), and since she woke up when the alarm went off and knew I was awake, she wouldn't let me sleep for ten more minutes. So up we woke. I fed her, took her out a couple times, all that jazz, and then I put on her harness and leash and off we went. It only takes around 15-20 minutes to walk around the little loop of park that goes behind the houses across the street, so it's not terribly long or anything. She did fairly well, considering it was her second walk ever. Towards the end of the park part (where it ends, or at least goes across the street, and where we normally turn to head home), there are some dogs in one of the fenced-in backyards. They didn't really bark at us or anything, mostly just watched, but Hazel's not very used to other dogs I think. And then there were a few she saw across the street coming our way, and I could tell she wanted me to pick her up. So I did, and I carried her most of the rest of the way home which was fine. She is still little, and not used to walks, so yeah. I'm planning on doing this every day now (I really, really, really need to start going to bed closer to 10 instead of as close to midnight and even 1 that it's been lately), so she'd better get used to it.

It's nice going for a walk early in the morning. Helps that it should be a nice day today. And now with any luck she'll be a little bit tired out for Dad. And maybe soon she'll start to get used to, and even enjoy, going for walks and we can start going in the evenings too. Good stuff.

Except now I have a feeling that today is going to be a rather long day of trying not to fall asleep...although at least I have my two weekly meetings to help things a bit. Good good.

Do you suffer from long-term memory loss? I don't remember

Aw I just noticed my profile picture on here, and thought of the Backer and the fun times I had there. Life is pretty good right now, but I still miss those people and places and experiences. (And the ND fight song/Proud to be an American/Oh What a Night/Happy Trails combo.) Anyway.

Um...I was going to say something on here and now I have no idea what it was. Dangit. Was it that I'm making my parents watch The Office from the beginning, and it's awesome? I don't think so. But that is true. Haha.

Maybe it was...that the Celtics completely destroyed the Lakers tonight to win the championship (thereby making Mom, who has always been a Celtics fan even if it's been more or less dormant for awhile, quite happy). Semi-exciting to watch, even though I'm in no way a basketball fan. Helped that the team I was rooting for ended up winning, too.

Dude I have no idea what it was. Sigh. How annoying. Whatever. I decided tonight that I am going to get a new laptop over 4th of July weekend. I just am. I'm frankly surprised that my laptop has been on long enough this time around tonight for me to have time enough to write a blog post. An hour, two hours ago it started its fun "Let's see how long we can get Susie to restart her computer before she gives up" routine. Wouldn't stay on for more than five minutes. And then after letting it sit for awhile, I turned it on again and just didn't open Firefox for awhile (because that often seems to cause problems, if I can get the laptop to stay on long enough to sign onto AIM) because I was talking to people on AIM. But then I tried Firefox, and now it seems ok for now. Next webpage I try to open though will probably do it in, and then I'll just go to bed. But yeah. New laptop. Thing is, there are a lot of laptops out there. And I have no idea what's good and what's not, what I should look for, what I should avoid, any of that. I mean, all I need is a basic computer to do basic things on, but yeah. Sigh. Someone tell me what to get. My philo professor this last semester discussed one class that the more possibilities there are to choose from, the harder it is for people to make a decision. I think we were talking about it in the context of voting and such, but it's applicable in all situations really. Especially for me. And there are a lot of options for laptops. So, that's not too great.

But guess what? My puppy is cute. So much fun, if quite tiring sometimes. So worth it all. She has shifty eyes too -- she'll look at you out of the corner of her eye a lot. It's so cute. Makes me smile when I'm at work and I think about it. My sweet puppy. She's a good girl.

Man I wish I could remember what I came on here to post about. Sigh. Oh well. Doubt it'll come to me any time soon.

Know what? I need to buy a new journal. I think I have a blank one upstairs, but it's not a spiral, it's a binding-type one. Those are just annoying to write in because I have to hold down the opposite side with my arm while I try to write in the other side. No thanks. Not that I have much to write about anyway these days. I don't do too much -- just go to work, mostly. I have very few friends in town again this summer, and am too tired most days after work to do anything (plus I feel bad leaving Hazel with my parents, when Dad watches her all day. I think he's going to start leaving her in the crate for longer periods during the day though, and start doing his work in the dining room again instead of the card table he set up in the family room where her crate is. That'll be good, I think, and then I'll feel less bad about pawning her off on my parents an occasional night here and there. Hehe). I think I'm going mini golfing tomorrow night though, so that should be fun. Maybe. Anyway.

Hey did you know that Colorado has great sunsets and clouds and skies and such? It's true. Seriously.

Aaaaaand...yeah. Still wish I could remember what it was. Oh well.

If I were reading my blog, I'd be afraid to open that link (because my laptop might DIE)

Man, this looks so cool. Why does it have to be so far away? (And in Detroit? Ew.)

In other news, my computer sucks. Oh yeah, that's not news. I'm on my parents' computer now because I just can't take the shut downs anymore. But I don't have any of my bookmarks or anything on here. None of my saved passwords. Etc. Sigh. I am thinking more and more that I'll get a computer from 4th of July sales. Hopefully there's some semi-good sale. It's frustrating because I know (or am fairly certain) it's a Windows problem, but I don't know how to fix it (and I don't think that they'll honor my Dell warranty. If that hasn't run out by now, which I think it might have. I think it was until June 14th or 17th or something). Whatever. I'm sick of that laptop anyway, and its hotness and its hugeness. I will miss the familiarness of its keyboard, though. A new keyboard will have a different setup, even if just slightly, and the keys will feel different, and they won't be worn from my four years of use. (People other than me will be able to tell what the D an E and N keys are again.) Anyway. Old, familiar keyboard, or new working laptop with new keyboard? Tough choice there.

But good things, that far outweigh my less than satisfactory computer: Hazel is puppy-plump again! She had gotten so stick-thin, ribs sticking out and everything, by the end of Saturday (the day with all the dry heaves). But she's been eating like a champ since then (did I ever say that her first known word was yummy-yummy? That's what we call food. Any food. And boy does she ever know that word. She now also knows "speak" and "give me your paw" thanks to Dad, the last one just learned today). She's so much fun. Still loves ice cubes. And today Dad made a new toy -- putting a marble underneath a frisbee. She already loved marbles, and got really excited at the frisbee when it was topside up, especially when there's something under it. So it was a fun new toy to attack today. She likes it when we put anything underneath some sort of bowled thing (the frisbee, an upside down bowl or old cool whip container or a tupperware, anything). Especially if she can hear that thing moving around underneath the bowl. Gets her all riled (when she's in the mood. Sometimes she just wants some lovin', especially if someone just got home or came back from being away from her for more than like three minutes).

Man. She's all kinds of cute. Sort of ADD at times, but so much fun. Of course, she's ridiculously hyper right now (she's never this hyper this late -- it's 10:30), and I hope she gets over that soon. We're going to bed soon. So she'll have to.

Speaking of which, I should do that now. I have a long day of...who knows what ahead of me tomorrow. (Don't know if I have enough on my plate tomorrow to keep me busy all day...but maybe I do. One of these days I'll be better at this job, and know the ins and outs, know the ropes, the whole nine yards. Or something like that. I can't wait, because I really really really like it there. Seriously.)

Aren't I lucky?

I think I'm one of the only people on the planet who can possibly be cold sitting inside a non-air conditioned house when it's in the high 80s, possibly 90s outside, wearing a t-shirt and mid-calf capris. Seriously, it's sort of pathetic. But hey, my coldness allows me to model my extensive hoodie collection all year round! Nothing bad about that.

Also: Swinging (on swings) makes me a little bit motion sick. Anything beyond just gentle swaying, that is. Also pathetic.

Oh, and I finally decided to try putting music onto my Zune today. What did I expect to happen? I expected my laptop to freeze or go to the BSoD in the middle of it. What actually did happen? I couldn't download the software from Firefox, because I had forgotten that a few weeks ago my Firefox decided to stop downloading things. So then I tried it in Internet Explorer, and it was going fine, and then it said it couldn't download because it's not supported by XP service pack 1 which is what I have, because I have yet to be able to manage to get SP2 downloaded for some reason. It's irritating. And so then I get this message that says there's new hardware detected (because to charge the battery you have connected it through the USB port), but it doesn't work right because the software didn't download because it can't. And then whatever I've tried to do, my computer would just freeze or go to the BSoD as soon as I opened firefox again (and sometimes before). So I unplugged the mp3 player even though it's not done charging yet, and now things are calmed down a bit, but ugh. Why does my computer hate me? I think I'll be looking to see if there are any good deals on laptops for 4th of July sales. Assuming this one doesn't completely crap out on me before then. But I guess that means that I can't use my mp3 player until I get a new laptop (unless I want to transfer alllll my music onto my parents' computer, which I don't). Maybe I can somehow get service pack 2 to download on here, even though my previous attempts have been quite unsuccessful.

Boo.

I wish I were getting/had gotten a stimulus check. Unfortunately I wasn't eligible for one at the time, but if it were now, I would be. Dad says that he heard somewhere that people whose statuses (stati?) changed during the year to one where they would qualify, they'll be able to get something back from taxes next year. So...that's good I guess. Doesn't help me much now, though, when I could use it to replace my brick of a laptop. Really more like two bricks. Plus the huge adapter. Lately, sometimes it seems that half the time I'm "on" my computer, I'm sitting here turning it off and on over and over trying to get it to stay on and stick for a few minutes so I can actually use it. Sigh. Oh well. One of these days, I'll get a new one, I hope.

Morning does eventually come

Thank God, Hazel seems pretty much back to her old self today. Yesterday and last night were so emotionally draining, and physically tiring too (she woke me up at 2:30 am with her heaving, which resulted in some nice spit throw-up like she'd been doing all day, but luckily it was entirely confined to the folded up old sheet I put in there last night. I was glad I decided to take out the pillow we had wrapped in it before I put it in her crate. Figured something like that might happen, and it's easier to wash just a sheet than a pillow). But for whatever reason, after that last incident in the middle of the night, despite the fact that I figured I'd be woken up two hours later or something, she didn't get up until I did at 6:30. I was worried at first, though, because normally when I wake up and she hears me moving around she gets antsy to get out of the crate, but she didn't this morning. But she's been back to normal other than that. Obviously hungry this morning, and still seeming hungry today (which in itself is such an improvement over yesterday, when she couldn't care less about food). No throwing up as of yet, so I doubt we'll see any more of that. Very active and playful today. All good things.

Which is nice, because Mass today included a "homily" that was part advertisement for a father-son rafting trip (complete with powerpoint and Harry "Chapin's Cat's in the Cradle") and part reminiscing-type-deal for the priest who's been there for a year or so who's being moved in two weeks. I guess that part wasn't as annoying as the power point advertisement, but I was already less than thrilled by that point. Sigh. And the sad thing is, I'd look elsewhere, but I just don't know that there's much better options anywhere else in this diocese. Sad for me, but that is what it is. Oh well. Maybe some day there'll be another regular Mass somewhere around here that's more traditional and includes some Latin and maybe even -- gasp! -- some chant. It happened once, for a little while, so maybe it'll happen again.

Someone tell me a new home page. Mine's been ND Webmail for probably four years (I'm pretty sure I set it to that almost immediately), but I check it so rarely these days, and someday soon it'll be gone (my account, that is -- you don't get to keep it once you graduate, but you do get to sign up for an alumni.nd.edu account. It'd be so much easier if they just let you keep it though, like other schools do). Any suggestions? Maybe I'll just make it facebook or something. I could make it gmail, except I don't want to use my primary gmail account anymore (I've mostly only ever used it to sign up for things, really). I made another one recently that I'd like to try to turn into my primary email account, but the problem there is my blogger account is set up with my other (more spam-y) gmail account. I'm sure there's some way to transfer email addresses in blogger, but I think it requires some work on my part (aside from just changing it in my account). Of course, at the same time I've been considering lately switching over to wordpress or something for my blog...Man, only I can take such a stupid unimportant thing like my homepage or email/blog account and turn it into a major decision to mull over for an extended period of time.

Man, I want to go on a date. Anyone want to take me out?

And wow, I just realized how much bigger Hazel is than when we got her. I mean, I knew she was growing, but it's hard to tell when you see her every day. She's definitely bigger now. And so cute.

Ok off to do other things now.

Today has not been a good day

I slept in until almost 9am, at which point the puppy must have whined or done something to wake me up. I laid there for a few minutes, but I heard what sounded like her dry heaving or something and figured it might be a good sign to get out of bed. Took her down and outside, she peed and stuff, we went inside where she happily greeted my parents, and I put down a bowl of kibble for her. Except for the fact that we got up two hours later than normal, it was pretty typical. Except then she didn't eat. No interest at all. And a little later, I heard her stomach start heaving like dogs' stomachs do when they're about to vomit. Took her outside where she just dry heaved. Nothing but some spit. She didn't have anything to vomit up. I googled it, and apparently this can happen with puppies and dogs if they go too long without eating. It gives them an upset stomach. So I gave her a puppy biscuit, thinking maybe she'd find that more appetizing than the kibble. She took it and went into her crate with it, but then just laid down and didn't eat it. And all day since then, she's been pretty lethargic, hasn't eaten a thing, has drank only minimal water (but she will suck on ice cubes we've been giving her to give her at least something to stay hydrated), and has been dry heaving intermittently throughout the day. I really think I should take her to the vet. We probably will if she's not any better by tomorrow, but Dad doesn't seem as concerned about it as I am at this point. He thinks she probably just ate something yesterday that's not agreeing with her. This is a lot of not agreeing with her, though.

Sigh. This sucks. I want her to feel better. She seems so pathetic, lying there all depleted. I just wish she'd eat something. Or...something. I was supposed to go to a party for my friend's birthday tonight. Just a little get-together at her house. But I don't want to leave Hazel alone, and my parents are at a meeting tonight. (Today happens to be their 28th anniversary, by the way, which is pretty cool. We kids will have to find something good to do for their 30th in two years.) Sigh. Poor puppy.

And I just read an article about that pregnant "man" -- the woman who had a sex change and got married (to a woman) and then they decided to have a baby, so "he" stopped taking testosterone and then got artificially inseminated. It's just so...wrong. So against the nature of things. All of it. If "he" wants to be a man (which he obviously isn't really), then he should accept all the consequences of it. You can't (or shouldn't be able to) pick and choose stuff like that. He said he specifically kept the female reproductive organs so he could have a child someday, and then said "I'm a person, and I have the right to have my own biological child." I don't really think that's in the constitution anywhere, first of all. Secondly, if that were true then why can't men have children? It's just all messed up. Children aren't possessions to which we have some sort of God-given right. Our world is so whacked-out.

And ugh I'm watching my DVDs of American Dreams (I really wish they'd put the second and third seasons on DVD one of these days), and have only watched the first episode so far. It ends with Kennedy being shot (well, the characters finding out about it), and the second starts with the main characters watching the funeral on TV. I'm all emotional today and it's making me cry watching this. I wish I weren't alone right now.

Ah weekend

I was about to be really pathetic on here. Thought better of it, though. But don't worry, I'm still pathetic, no doubt about that.

Aw, I was just watching the local NBC news here and the anchor guy read this little thing that I think he had written for the end of the broadcast, about Tim Russert. I'm pretty sure he almost started choking up right at the end of it. So sad. I did almost cry when I first heard about it, I'll admit. Surprisingly. He had an honorary ND degree, did you know that?

Anyway. I'll move away from that now.

I have a few cute pictures of Hazel I'd love to put up here. Unfortunately, though, it requires uploading them from my camera, and my computer lately has gone in a cycle like this: It's turned off (or on standby, depending on how it acted the night before when I was ready for bed) for most of the day. I turn it on when I get home from work, usually between 5-6 or so. Maybe later some days. And then it'll go pretty well (for this thing, at least) for a good few hours, generally. But after being on for a few hours (3-4, maybe 5) it starts getting touchy, and it'll randomly freeze or go to the BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH. (You have to say it like that. Loud and scarily. It's required.) And then I'll have to go through the turning it off and on a few times before it's ok again for a little while. But after that first time, I can't trust it for very long after that. And it's already done that tonight, so no pictures today. Maybe tomorrow my goal will be to upload pictures as soon as I turn on my computer, and then maybe even upload music onto my MP3 player! But I probably won't, because I never think to do that stuff right away. Oh well.

I guess for now you'll just have to trust me that Hazel is still cute.

Hey, know what's gross? Hulk Hogan's soon to be ex-wife is apparently dating a 19 year old. She's like 50. Ick.

Driving home today, at one point I was behind a car whose license plate was "###-GIT" and it made me laugh because I thought of Harry Potter. And then I thought, again, as I do all the time while reading the books and such, that I wish they hadn't felt the need to translate the books from English to American English for us over here in the good ol' USA. I mean, seriously, changing "Philosopher's Stone" to "Sorcerer's Stone"? Ridiculous. I would like to read the original versions of these books sometime, just to see what the actual English words are. Half the charm is that it's set in England and thus they talk like British people and whatnot. But we're too dumb over here in America to know what they're saying, I suppose. Because words can't be looked up or anything like that. They don't change everything, though -- because things like "git" and "snogging" are still there. Definitely not American words. Oh well. Gotta go for the lowest common denominator, don't you know.

Man I'm tired. Tomorrow is the first time since...two Saturdays ago that I won't have to wake up to an alarm. I'm assuming (hoping) Hazel will wake me up when she wakes up and decides it's time to pee. If not, she'll just have to let it go in her crate I guess. Either way, I don't think I'll be sleeping until noon or even 10am. But as long as I get to bed fairly soon, it's fine. We like sleep.

I don't care, it's sad.

So, Tim Russert died today. Apparently this isn't that big a deal to some people, but I'm pretty sad about it. I mean, he's just another person who I would never have known existed were it not for TV and such, but I did know that he existed and as such it's sort of jarring since he wasn't sick or old or anything like that. I'm not as sad about this as I was when Steve Irwin died (which, oddly, I was just thinking about today for some reason...although now I can't remember if it was before or after I heard about Tim Russert...maybe it was after which would make it not odd), but it's still pretty sad. I always thought he seemed pretty nice and fair, and I liked him (as much as I like any news show anchor).

Anyway.

Inventory Day

Sounds sort of like an Office title, doesn't it? Like Diversity Day. What a great show. Anyway, that was today. Started with Mass at St Pat's at 7am (7!am!), which was nice enough. I actually hadn't been there since they finished the remodeling (I think the last time I was there was for my friend's confirmation four years ago). So yeah. Anyway. We headed over to the store after that, and since I'm not up on the backroads and such between the two places, I just went back to Academy. Unfortunately this required me to sit and wait at a light to turn left onto Academy from a very small street. And I swear, I can't remember the last time I was stuck at a light that long. I know I must have been waiting there for at least five minutes, the light just sitting all red and stuff, people on Academy just continuing to go happily along while the line of cars behind me got longer and longer. It was ridiculous, and I started to think maybe the light was broken or something. Eventually, it did turn green for that street, so that was good.

And then inventory. Oh, inventory. Actually it wasn't bad, really. I've done inventory at retail stores twice before (Dillards two -- no, three -- summers ago, and Wilsons last year...maybe...hm it was either in the summer, which would have been two summers ago, or it was closer to January 2007. Either way), and I didn't really mind it. Both times I had to come in after the store closed to do it, and in the case of Dillards it required staying until almost 2am I think, but whatever. I really don't mind inventory. There's something oddly satisfying about it. For me. I could do that kind of thing all the time, I think. Although I'm sure I'd get sick of it.

Anyway though.

The worst part about the whole day was that at around 11:30 or 12, I noticed a spot in my line of vision. At first I thought it might just be from looking out the window and happening to catch the reflection of the sun off of a car or something, but then it wasn't really going away and I got nervously suspicious. And then it seemed like it was getting a little bigger, spreading a bit more in my line of vision. So I went back to my desk, rummaged through my purse for my baggie of medicine, and popped two excedrin. Continued inventorying for awhile, hoping hoping hoping that the fuzzy vision would go away and the migraine wouldn't come. Because when I get that in my line of sight, that fuzziness that makes it so I can't see very well where it is (and it's always situated towards the right side), it means a migraine is coming. I've only had that happen a few times that I can remember, but it's never fun. Anyway. Eventually the fuzziness went away, but I just felt drained after that, and did end up getting a headache. Took another excedrin with lunch, an hour or so later, and then a fourth a bit after that. Things almost got pretty bad, but I had gotten it taken care of well enough that it was manageable. Not fun, but not terrible. I was just pretty shaky and weak in the afternoon/evening. Oh well. At least it didn't turn into the debilitating thing that it easily could have (and quite possibly would have) had I not taken the excedrin when I did.

Ok, how boring was that.

Here's something fun (to me): My puppy is so cute. She's definitely bigger than when I got her, obviously, but she still seems so little! She's so much fun. Tonight apparently my parents and Jason took her for her first walk, and it was a long one. (I was at bible study, hence I didn't go.) They said she didn't like being pulled along very much at first, but then she got the hang of things and figured out that going on walks is fun. Even Jason walked her for a little while, which must have been so funny to see (Dad said she pulled him along pretty well, but he didn't want to let go and give her back to Dad). So fun. Next Saturday we start puppy classes. I hope those will go well. I think I went to one once when Pebo was a puppy (which means16-17 years ago, I think, probably closer to 16), but I don't really remember it. I hope it's worth it. I'm sure it will be. She's a good dog, and I think she mostly has the rules of the house down (she's even starting to get the hang of going to the door when she has to go to the bathroom -- we're still not accident-free yet though, but looks like we're getting there) even if she doesn't always follow them very well. So we'll see how those go.

Hazel really likes moths, though, which we like in a dog here. And not only regular moths, but she loves sphinx moths too. If you've never seen one, they're basically huge moths. I think some are even the size of hummingbirds. I don't remember if Pebo used to be that into the whole moth thing (I'm sure she was to an extent at least), but Kebbie definitely loved them. And Colt did too, even though she was pretty terrible at catching/killing/eating any. We'd bring in one or two for her at night when they were out, and throw it on the ground to stun it a bit so she'd have a chance, and she'd just bat it around until it came to enough to fly up to where she couldn't get it. And usually Kebbie would end up getting it. Still fun to watch though. Both of them also enjoyed playing with sphinx moths we would bring in (and I use "we" loosely; I don't mind catching the regular moths, but sphinx moths kind of creep me out), but as Colt was a terrible hunter and Kebbie seemed to be to turned off by the fast fluttering big wings, usually they'd just end up getting batted around and pawed at and maybe chewed a little bit until they gave up and died. And then the pets would lose interest, and the next morning we'd find a dead moth body somewhere where the dog or cat left it.

So when Dad brought in one yesterday morning (somewhat odd to be playing with moths in the morning) to see what Hazel would do with it (we already knew she liked regular moths. And ants. She's eaten lots of those, including what looked like a queen. And apparently a spider too, ew), I didn't really think she'd do much. But. She had a lot of fun. Playing with it, pawing at it, carrying it around in her mouth a little (man it was big. Ick). And eventually, despite the wings, she ate it. Bleck, but sorta cute too. Dad found another this morning that he brought in as I was leaving, which apparently she ate as well, and he even found a second this morning that she ate. The one I saw today was a bit smaller, but still. It's funny. Dad things she's going to be a good mouser. That'll be potentially disgusting. No, not potentially, definitely. Unless I never, ever know about it. I'm all for her catching things and hunting around and such, but I do have my limits. I just hope she doesn't turn into a dog who wants to hunt and kill cats. I don't know if she's ever met one yet, really, but I've heard cattle dogs can tend to be rather...violent towards cats. Or they want to be violent, at least. And I would like to get a cat at some point, possibly (not while living here though. Dad's done with cats). Anyway though. Don't need to worry about that right now.

I do need to worry about getting to sleep. Aw man it's so late already, when did that happen? Sigh. At least tomorrow is Friday. I hope I can get through the day all right, and then it'll be the weekend! Yay! Although there is a bit of excitement taken out when I realize that the weekend doesn't mean I get to sleep in until noon. I have a puppy to take care of now, who has gotten used to 6:30am wake ups/bladder-emptying/feedings. But that's what mid-morning naps are for. Besides, she's totally worth it. (Enter cute puppy picture here, if I weren't too lazy to attempt uploading my newest pictures from my camera, especially when I think that my laptop will probably find something it doesn't like and shut down halfway through... I really wish I weren't so paranoid about this, because I really want to get my music onto my new MP3 player. I mean, I have one now, so it'd be nice to use it.)

By the way, the Celtics came back from what was at one point a 24 point deficit in tonight's game 4 to win by five or six (or seven?) points. They now lead the Lakers 3 games to 1. If you're thinking to yourself, "What? Mention of basketball on Susie's blog? I thought she hated all things basketball", you'd be pretty right to do so. (Man I miss football.) I'm just not a basketball fan. But, my mom is a fairly big Celtics fan (used to be way back when, especially, like when she was in high school and stuff. And maybe before that. I don't really know), so she's pretty excited. It was fun watching the last quarter tonight just for her reactions. So I'm hoping, just for her, that they win it all. Which is looking pretty likely.

Anyway. Time for bed (like...two hours ago).

Puppies = happiness

It's undeniably, 100% fact that dogs make Susie a happier person. The first week I was working, right before I got Hazel, I was just bleh. I mean, the job was good and all, but it was so depressing, my second week of being in a dogless house. But in the two weeks since we've had her, I've been so much more happy on a consistent level. It's great. I've always heard that having pets makes people happier (generally; obviously people who are allergic or, you know, hate pets probably wouldn't have the same results), but until the past few months I haven't been able to know for sure. But now I know. Pets rock. Not pet rocks, but hey whatever works for you I guess.

Hm..........I like my job. Have I mentioned? I don't think I have. Tomorrow though, instead of getting there at 8:30, we're doing inventory all day and starting the day with Mass at 7. 7am. And it's at St Pat's which is slightly further from my house than the store. Meaning I have to leave closer to 15 minutes before, instead of my typical 7-10. And ugh. Technically, I should try to wake up around 5, because that's an hour and a half earlier than I usually wake up, and I have to leave an hour and a half earlier than normal. But...5am is just soooo earrrrrrrly. Oh well. At least I'll have stuff keeping me busy (and hopefully awake) all day.

I just gotta say: This week, I've been quite glad that I live in lovely Colorado and not the crazy-weather midwest. There but by the grace of God. Man. I love those mountains. Keep out the tornadoes. Of course, we've been in EXTREME FIRE DANGER lately, which could have bad results if the right circumstances happen, but at least my house isn't in danger of being blown away or swept away by water. Although it would be nice if they'd send some of that water our way.

Ok. It's 10pm. Aw I still have some reading to do for bible study tomorrow night...guess I really need to sign off now. I was just going to go to bed (how sad it is that even if I went to sleep right this instant, I'd still only get 7 hours of sleep? Although, that's more than I've gotten in one night in awhile now). But first I have to do that. So. Yes. Good bye.

The well seems to be drying up

I have nothing much to talk about lately. Even here, where I never talk about anything; let's face it.

I'm enjoying my job immensely (but am terrified I'm not learning quickly enough or doing a good enough job and will find myself let go one of these days. Probably a most unjustified and irrational fear, but there it is). I'm not so much enjoying the waking up at 6:30 every morning (even weekends, maybe I can stretch it to 7 or 7:30 if I'm lucky and the puppy had nothing in her bladder when we went to bed), but I must admit that it's nice to feel like a normal person and not a loser/slacker who sleeps in until 10 or 11 and then doesn't do much the rest of the day. I hope this job sticks, I really really do. I just hope they have patience with me (unless my fears at this point are completely dumb and they know I am learning from scratch, basically, and thus aren't really expecting as much as I think they're expecting. In which case, right now, patience isn't terribly necessary). It's a good place, people.

Hazel's doing well. She got her next round of puppy shots today, as well as another deworming. And they said that she now definitely has the a-ok to go around where other dogs are/have been. Uber-exciting for me because I've been waiting impatiently to take her on a walk, to Palmer Park, to Memorial Park. Well, Palmer Park might still have to wait a bit (she is still small, although VERY energetic, and she's definitely not at all used to being on a leash. She doesn't like it unless she's leading, apparently. So we have to get working on that now). But it's exciting. Much easier to tire out a puppy by taking her for a walk than tossing toys back and forth (especially considering she's not the greatest at bringing the toys back sometimes...). Plus, more exercise for me.

Speaking of that, sort of, I've been eating three regular meals every day now that I wake up at 6:30, am at work by 8:30, and home by 5:30 (well, earlier most days, but yeah). I can't remember the last time I actually ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner on a regular basis, even though I've heard countless times that it's one of the best ways to get healthy and maybe even start losing a little (little) bit of weight. Not starving yourself and whatnot, gets metabolism going, etc. However, it requires either waking up early enough to fit in a breakfast before lunch, or just pushing back all three meals by three or so hours (which would mean eating dinner at 9 or so. Might work in Europe, but not so much here). Now, I'm sure it's all in my head (I really think all of it is in my head -- both positive and negative) but I feel like I might be looking a little little bit more trim. A very little bit. Not enough that I can really tell with clothes or anything, but those times where I'm feeling less than trim I can't really tell with my clothes either. They don't tend to feel tight or loose. They're just there, like they always are, so whatever. I rarely weigh myself either (hard to weigh myself when there's no scale anywhere that I am ever, unless I manage to drag myself down to the Y), so I have no evidence whatsoever when I feel either fatter or thinner. Just me. And I guess that's good enough. One of these days, maybe I'll actually be thinner, but not today. (I'll be honest -- part of the reason I was so itching to get a dog is so I'd have some impetus to go exercise on a regular basis. Sort of like I now have a built-in alarm clock that won't let me hit snooze. But yeah, with Kebbie, I'll admit we were never very good about taking her and Pebo for regular walks. Especially the last few, five years. And then when I started really wanting to, more recently, Kebbie was too old to go running with me or for extended walks and such. But Hazel? Once she gets full grown, I'm sure I'll be trying to keep up with her, even though she'll be smallish. Sort of smallish. Anyway.)

Look at that, I've already got a long post here! Too bad it's full of nothing. It's a wonder I have friends at all; I never have anything interesting to say, nothing to contribute when there's a conversation going. And then there's the fact that for some reason I'm terrible at interjecting whatever I might have to say when I do have something to say. Probably because I think it's not worth making other people stop talking long enough to listen to me, so I don't even try. Hm. Eh oh well.

Hey, breaking news: Gas is getting expensive. And I drive an SUV (and sometimes an Oldsmobile). I almost want to try riding a bike to work, except for it'd mean two things: Riding a bike on busy streets (not too keen on that idea), and having to leave much earlier for work. I mean, it usually takes around 7 minutes to get to work from my house, so it's not really far. But I'm sure it'd take at least half an hour, easily, to bike. Plus I'd be gross and sweaty. The ride there probably actually wouldn't be that bad (it's pretty much all downhill from here to there, or at least flat), but the ride back, at the end of the day, when it's hotter than the morning? That would be not fun. Oh well. I have a job now, which means I can afford to buy things once in awhile. And I share gas expenses with my parents anyway. So it's not that bad. Yet. If it gets up to $5 or $7, who knows. I'm personally all for going back to horse and carriage (I realize this would take longer than cars, obviously, and be somewhat messier too), but that'll never happen.

I really want to go see a movie. But I don't know what. Still haven't seen Prince Caspian, or Indiana Jones, or...anything else that's come out since...hm...the last movie I remember seeing in theaters was 27 Dresses, and that was fairly early into this last semester. I did see National Treasure 2 in the theater sometime mid-lateish April, but that was at the cheapo theater and doesn't really count. Might as well have been renting it. I want to go to a big expensive theater and see a movie. There's just something fun about it, although I guess it's best if left to maybe only once every few months or so. Knowing me, I won't see a movie in the theater until Batman 2 comes out in July, and yes I will be seeing that in the theater. Even if I have to go alone. Ok maybe that's not true, but I will be seeing it on the big screen.

Oh did I mention that I did drive up to Denver on Sunday to go to Holy Ghost (speaking of trying to save gas)? It was lovely, as expected. Totally worth it just to hear organ music again. Man I miss organ music.

I just found out, because he's on Leno promoting a movie that looks just awful, that Justin Timberlake is dating Jessica Biel. I'm seriously indescribably happy that I did not know this. I just did some quick Googling and as far as I can tell it looks like they've been dating for well over a year now. I wish I didn't know as much about celebrities as I do, but it's good to know that there are still some things about them I don't know. I can only hope that the latter category gets bigger and bigger, because celebrity-ism is stupid.

I had one more thought in my head I wanted to preserve on the Internet for all eternity...but it's gone now. And the Internet will be a sadder place for all eternity because of that. We all know how cool my thoughts are.

Um...well, it's almost 11. Way past my bedtime (or, what should be my bedtime if I were smarter). Puppy's already pretty catatonic (ha), which means as always that she'll hate it when I take her out to pee one last time before bed in a few minutes.

Hey, did you know it's already a third of the way through June? The year is close to half over. Weird. So far, I won't be too sad to say goodbye to 2008. It's still got a few months to convince me otherwise, though. Although, now that I think about it, why would I want to be sad to say goodbye to another year? It's going to go anyway, and if it's been a good year, theoretically that should continue to the next one, right? Maybe not. I don't think I'm making any sense because my eyes are starting to burn from the tiredness. Or maybe it's pink eye (I was 99% sure this morning that I had it again. Symptoms haven't continued throughout the day though, so maybe it's just another false alarm like the Cedar Point alleged pink eye. The pre-wedding pink eye was real, though. At least it wasn't my wedding). Either way, it's time to go to bed. Puppy agrees.

I think I kinda like my puppy

You know, much as I'm going to miss watching football games live in person, it's really not that bad to watch them on TV. Oh, ND football games I mean. Obviously. Yeah. Anyway, watching them in the comfort of one's own home (or at a game watch) means being able to sit down much of the game. Not having to put up with annoying drunk students. Not dealing with bad (hot, cold, wet, windy, etc) weather. Of course, it also means not hearing the ND announcer, not hearing Officer Tim McCarthy ("May I have your attention please!"), not hearing the band most of the time, not smelling the smells of the stadium, not doing push ups, not being a part of it, oh and also having to listen to the annoying team of Tom Hammond and the other guy who does the commentary for NBC...Hayden I think. Yeah. They suck. But oh well. Sigh I miss football. I like the Red Sox, but it's just nowhere near as cool as football. I hope I can go to a pro game sometime (even if it's just the Broncos).

We took puppy for her first vet visit this morning. She did really well, both at the vet and in the car. She was very subdued the whole time and has mostly been sleeping since we got home an hour ago. And she dozed while we were there too (while waiting for the vet to see us and such). She (the vet) thinks Hazel might be maybe a little part Australian Shepherd in addition to the Cattle Dog. She said their ears usually would have stood up straight by now if they were going to, and Hazel's are more bent (and floppy, aw) and look like Aussie Sheps ears do. Plus, Hazel is softer than the vet would expect a cattle dog to be. It might just be her puppy coat, but she seemed to think it wasn't just that. So anyway. I sure wouldn't mind if Hazel's fur was softer and a bit fluffier than regular cattle dogs. I'm a fan of fluff. So anyway. We learned some things, have some things to decide, etc. But she's healthy, so that's good. She has a bit of a belly button hernia (apparently a little common, and not a big deal, especially how small hers is), but that can be taken care of when we get her spayed. Anyway. Everyone agrees that she has a great face (her markings and such). She really does. Hehe.

Ok so it's a lot later in the day now (in that...it's now 9:30 at night. I forgot to post this earlier. Oh well), and I just had a lot of fun messing with Hazel. She goes through spurts throughout the day where she just has tons of energy, and then she crashes for awhile. Anyway, Dad and I had gone food shopping, and she was ready to play when we got back. I had gotten her a new toy at the store (a little rubber ball with a bell inside of it), so I showed it to her. At first she just wanted to greet her people, but then she got hyper. So Dad and I decided to overload her. She has a fair amount of toys she loves playing with, so we kept grabbing them and throwing it so she'd chase it, then through something else at her, and it just kept going. So much fun. We have this big tarantula thing (fake, obviously) that squeaks when you squeeze the butt. She LOVES it. She'll grab one of the legs and just start swinging it around like dogs do, and man. If we squeak it she goes crazy for it. She can't squeak it yet, but yeah. And then there's a few balls that squeak that she loves, and the new one I got her she seems to enjoy, and she goes crazy if we stick like a golf ball or this little weird bird thing we have that makes sort of a birdy noise when it gets tipped or even just nothing underneath and upside down cool whip bowl. She'll paw at it, try to dig on top of it, push it around. Good times. And then there's also high-tech stuff like sticks and empty paper towel rolls that she enjoys. Oh, and an empty plastic water bottle. You know. She's not really picky. (Which is both good and bad -- she'll chew on pretty much anything if we let her. Which we don't.)

Oh, about the coupons thing I (think I) referred to yesterday -- I had written a comment on the Sally Hansen website a couple weeks ago because I was so amazed that the nail polish I had used for Peter's wedding still hadn't chipped three days later. For me, nail polish chips after like three hours. And I had heard someone say that often, if you write in to a company about their products, you might just get some coupons or freebies. I figured what the heck. And then after a few days I had forgotten about it, and remember sometime in the last couple days and figured I wasn't going to hear anything. Then yesterday I checked the mail on the counter when I got home, and had something addressed to me -- hand written address -- with a Del Laboratory return address. Didn't know what it was. One sheet of paper inside, and I realized what it was when I saw the coupons. I guess they're who runs the Sally Hansen line (along with some other brands). Anyway. I got a $5, 3, and 1 coupon. How exciting is that? Maybe now I'll buy nail polish! Nail polish that isn't $1 or less and will obviously start chipping as soon as it dries. So that was the highlight of my day yesterday. (Which doesn't mean I had a bad day. I just got really, really excited about those coupons!)

Well. Sunday is tomorrow. I need to figure out how to arrange my room to fit things (like a dog crate and a dresser. Right now it has to be one or the other...could be solved if I had a twin bed to replace my queen, but I don't think we have any single twins to use, plus I think the reason my back hasn't been as bad here as it was at school is because I have better mattress support. Which I probably wouldn't have with a twin, unless we bought a box mattress for a twin, which seems silly to do). Speaking of back pain, I'm seriously tempted to bring my ball (or as some would call it, a "fitness orb") to work to replace the computer chair I have there. I think it's really bad for me, especially with its arm rests. Not a good situation with how much of the day I spend sitting. But, well, sitting on a ball would inevitably lead to a lot of extra attention, and we all know I'm not the biggest attention-lover. It's something to consider, though. I'd probably want to show up early the day I bring it in so I can blow it up without disrupting everyone else, as the air thing that came with it to inflate it makes noise. We'll see.

The best intentions

I was going to write tonight about how great a week I've had -- I love working where I do, I have a puppy (yay!), and things are just good. Despite the fact that I don't think I've gotten more than five, maybe six hours of sleep a night since Saturday.

I was also going to talk about arguably the best part of my day -- some mail I got with three coupons in it. (Yes, there's a story to this.)

Instead, I went to the Sky Sox game with my sister and brother in law (and nephews, of course), which was fun. And then I came home. And was tired. And fell asleep on the couch. And now I need to get to bed before I just give up and stay here all night.

So...tomorrow, perhaps.

Just for you

In this crazy life, and through these crazy times it's you, it's you, you make me sing, you're every line, you're every word, you're everything. You're every song, and I sing along, 'cause you're my everything.

Seriously, Susie, pick a topic and stick with it!

Every once in awhile, often when I'm pretty tired, I get this feeling that makes me really want someone to play with my hair. Or just massage my head a little bit. It feels soooo good when people do that (not that people do it a lot, or ever, really). Practically puts me to sleep. I get it from my dad -- he loves it when my mom does that to him, and it always puts him to sleep. I don't understand how it doesn't do that for everyone. Maybe it does; I don't often ask around about it. Haha. That'd be weird. Anyway.

Yesterday after work I went to the library that's pretty close to where the store is, because I had looked online during my lunch break and saw that that library had the first season of The Office available. Of course, by the time I got there a few hours later, it had been checked out. But in an attempt to make my venture there not completely a waste, I browsed the movies they had and came away with five DVDs. Well, six, but when I went to check them out the lady informed me that I could only take out five because they were all the same category or something (as in, none of them were children's, I think, or maybe if one had been non-fiction or something it would have been ok). All five of them are oldies. Most are old movies I might have heard of but haven't seen. I don't even know why I got some of them. Started with picking up Swing Time, a favorite (yay Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers!), which ended up being the one I took out of the pile. Sort of wish I had gone with another though. Anyway. Then I saw "Spirit of St. Louis" with Jimmy Stewart. Then I also picked up Gunga Din (I have no idea why, except I like old movies, and it sounded like it might sort of be interesting?), Brigadoon (had heard of this one, although had no idea what it was about. Haven't watched it yet so I still don't really know), and Drums Along the Mohawk (again, no idea. But oooh, I just saw that it's directed by John Ford! He's pretty cool). Oh, and I got Meet Me in St. Louis too. I've seen that one before though, but it's good. Plus it's got one of my favorite Christmas songs in it (although...the song is followed by the mauling of a snowman...soooo...yeah).

Anyway. What's my point? Oh, here's the funny part -- the DVD player we have attached to the TV down here hasn't been working this week. It's just broken. I have an extra player in my room (some time ago, I think probably freshman year and summer before it, I bought a cheapo DVD player and then also got a free one for applying for some credit card and using it once. Both turned out to be the same, which was fine, and then I had one for here and one to leave up at school), and it works fine, so if need be I might just bring it down here. The remote needs a new battery, though, and they're weird batteries they use, but I bought a two pack a few months ago when the other remote (at school) needed a new battery. So that's somewhere in one of my still-unpacked boxes of stuff. Anyway. I assume that DVD player will attach to the TV (or is it VCR? I'm so used to my combo that I can't remember how it is on separated units) down here, even though it's a fancy-schmancy flat screen TV thing. It'll probably look down on my cheapy player. Anyway. I'll probably end up watching none of those five movies I rented. But I'd like to; they sound interesting at least. And you're pretty much guaranteed not to have to put up with sex scenes and bad language in movies made pre-1950. I mean, that line in Gone with the Wind was pretty scandalous at the time (for a movie), I think. Now it's strange if there's not at least something like that in most movies.

Hey, remember that big gross ingrown toenail thing I had going on last September/October? The one that was the worst my doctor said she'd ever seen? My toe tonight is feeling a little ingrown, same toe, same side. It's slightly disconcerting, but I'm sure it won't do what it did last time. Let's hope not, at least, because I had to go to the doctor to get it taken care of, and I'm currently uncovered insurance-wise. But it's ok, I have at least another month before I get to that point anyway. Haha.

I should not be allowed to go to Kohls. Ever. Especially by myself or without someone who will reign me in. And especially when they're not doing a 2-for-1 sale on pretty much EVERYTHING. Um...yeah.

Man, I wish The Office had been at the library. I love that show. It's been soooo long since the season finale! (Um...like...huh maybe four weeks? No, three.) I want to get my parents watching it though. I think they've seen an episode or two, but they need to start from the beginning.

People, "its" when a possessive is not "it's". NO APOSTROPHE. Why is this so hard to understand? Why is it so hard for people to get? Just be safe -- don't ever put an apostrophe there. I'd rather there be no apostrophe when there should be than to have an apostrophe when there definitely shouldn't be. I know it shouldn't bother me like it does, but man, it's (see -- IT IS) too rampant.

I think I might be going to Holy Ghost for Mass on Sunday. If so, I'm excited. If not...who knows.

I think I mentioned, I'm re-reading Harry Potter again. I love those books. They're just so good. Although why I'm reading books I've already read when there are any number of books I have yet to read that I want to read (including: Lord of the Rings, Pillars of the Earth, and any or all of the books for the Catholic Summer Reading Program -- plug, plug. I've heard this really great store is sponsoring it). But right now all I want to read are the highly entertaining and engaging Harry Potter books.

I need to go to bed. Why can't I go to bed at like 10? Or even 11? Why does it always have to be midnight, or even later? Just means I'm tired all the time. Especially when you add in an energetic puppy (who managed to hold her bladder all night last night!). Hopefully she'll be good again tonight. And get housebroken soon. Speaking of her, though, apparently to her my ND flip flops are magical. If they're anywhere around, she'll find them and lie down on them. Well, assuming they're near me. But it seems like she prefers sleeping on them over anything else. Luckily she doesn't seem to mind the crates too much, though.

Ok. Good night.

The little things

Puppy breath.

The way I can right-click a link in Firefox, tell it to open in a new tab, and the tab I'm currently in stays up as the main one (so I can go check out the link later).

Sunsets in Colorado (perhaps this isn't so little).

A nice pair of sweats.

A tired puppy.

Being employed in a very Catholic (really Catholic) place, surrounded by Catholic people.

Obama is getting the nomination! Oh, wait...that's right, I don't like him. (But neither do I like Clinton, so whatever.)

A puppy that likes to lie down near or on my feet.

A nice w-r combination (like "wracking").

The Internet, particularly its vast amounts of information on basically any topic under the sun (tonight, in particular, information about Australian Cattle Dogs that's making me feel better about my own little ACD -- assuming I can get it together well enough to put into action some of the things I have been reading about, particularly in the submission category. I'm the boss, not her, and hopefully I can get that across to her).

Bishop Fulton Sheen.

Re-reading Harry Potter.

And in the opposite category, today I found out that our new governor Bill Ritter recently(?) signed into effect a law that says men who define themselves as "transgendered" can use women's restrooms. And apparently it doesn't really define what transgendered might mean or anything, so basically it can be a big ol' free-for-all in the women's bathroom. Awesome. (As if it didn't take too long as it is in the women's restroom, without adding more people to the mix.) I guess women can probably go into the men's restroom (but why on earth would we want to?). It's just weird, is all. (Don't blame me. I didn't vote for the guy.)

Come on, we all know it's cute.

Disprove: There aren't many things cuter than a puppy who keeps falling down/over/sliding everywhere in her excitement (over seeing people, over attacking a toy, chasing an ice cube, etc). We have one step going down to the family room from the kitchen area (which is linoleum), and half the time Hazel walks down it she flops over onto her side or something. Especially if she's trying to get a toy that's down on the family room floor, or if she's carrying a toy in her mouth (especially this old stuffed lamb she pulled out from somewhere, maybe with the baby toys we have lying around, which is hilarious because this lamb is not much smaller than half her size. It's awesome watching her carry it around. Especially trying to get into her crate with it, because it's got bars that go up a good 3-5 inches at the doorway). Anyway. She's just so cute. I kept picturing her in my head all day and man did it make for a long workday. Although, not really. Just gave me something to look forward to (aside from the regular "ahh get to relax" thing that the end of the workday means). It is so awesome having a dog again to greet me when I'm home. And she's kinda attached to me, so she's always uber-excited to see me.

Oh man, this morning was hilarious. She did pretty well last night in the smaller crate in my room -- whined a little at first, but fell asleep pretty easily. I got up to take her out once during the night, and she woke up once or twice beyond that and whined for a second until I talked to her and told her to go back to sleep, and then we got up at 5:30 (which I figured would make for a rough day today, but luckily I kept myself busy all day and didn't really get that tired). When we came downstairs though, this morning, man was she all wiggly and excited to have people again, me and Dad. I took her outside, but then when we came back in, she didn't want to play with toys or anything for a good half hour -- if Dad would try to get her to play with her lamb or any other of her toys, she might sort of halfheartedly go after it for a second but then she would just go for his hand, wanting him to pet her. And she was really excited when Mom came down too. Just too cute.

I changed my computer background tonight. For the past few months it's been this picture of Kebbie and Colt, Kebbie on her chair Colt on the desk next to it, looking out the family room window at a squirrel that was out there. I miss those two, and it felt a little weird to change it to a picture of Hazel, but I did it. She is pretty cute, after all.

And completely unrelated: I have the Stanley Cup Finals on right now. I'm actually sort of starting to enjoy watching hockey, weird as that may be (for me). I mean, to me it does sort of just look like there's absolutely no skill, just do what you can to get the puck, and a lot of times it's just a free-for-all trying to get it from a big group or something. I know that's not true, but whatever. It's still fairly entertaining, at least the games I've watched lately.

Ok it's now going into 3rd overtime. That's just crazy. I want the Penguins to win just for Bethany, but at this point it's like, dude, someone score already! And let's face it, if the Pens do win tonight, there's very little chance they'll win two more in a row to win the Stanley Cup. But man. I can't imagine how tired those guys must be. 100 minutes of hockey played so far tonight.

Ahhh ok game over. Finally. Pittsburgh won, so yay for them (and Bethany). Apparently it was 109 minutes and 57 seconds of playing time. So. Holy smoly, that arena emptied out ridiculously fast! It's been like five minutes and it looks practically empty. Weird. I mean, not really because it was in Detroit so none of them want to celebrate, but still.

And now I really have to get to bed. There's no guarantee that at work tomorrow I'll have something to be doing the entire day like I did today, especially if I end up having to do something like research or write up something or some other project like that. Today I was getting addresses, stuffing envelopes, things like that most of the day (which I really didn't mind at all. I'm really ok with that kind of stuff). So. Who knows how tomorrow will go.

On that, goodnight.

Hazel(nut)!

Suddenly I'm hit with a wave of exhaustion that leads me to believe I'd probably be better served going up to bed soon than writing a blog post, but I have to!

Introducing...
Princess Consuela Bananahammock! Ok just kidding. This, my friends, is little miss Hazel(nut). Mostly we'll be calling her Hazel, but I think Hazelnut is her full name. I really wanted to name her Buttercup (not as in all cutesy-wutesy, but as in Princess Buttercup from The Princess Bride), but Dad thinks dog names should be one or two syllables only and Buttercup doesn't exactly lend itself to good two syllable nicknames. I mean, Butter, but yeah that's no good. So anyway. I was also thinking about Vespa (Princess Vespa from Spaceballs, not the Vespas that are transportation devices), but I think most people would go first to the latter connotation. And that's no good. I really like Hazel though. So whatever. It works.

What's that? You thought I had started to give up on getting a dog for awhile? I sort of had. But Dad and I went to a few places yesterday anyway, just to look around and maybe get one if something seemed to fit. Different rescue groups go to different Petsmarts and Petcos around the city on Saturday afternoons, so we went to three I think. The third one (where I was thinking we should go first, but didn't really say that because it was farther and I figured we might as well look around some anyway) was where we got her. The other two places we went mostly had older puppies and dogs, and we wanted younger (8-10 weeks). The third place had a lot of puppies. Pretty much only puppies, actually. And her. Aw. The group she was with (I think it was just one litter, but might have been two that were in the same little fenced in area) had two adopted already (with collars that marked them as such), and all the rest were boys. I was thinking I'd want a girl. But all the puppies in that group were so easygoing, so good, and seemed great, so I was about ready to go with a boy. And then they put a puppy back that I hadn't seen in there before; maybe someone had been holding her. Anyway, I immediately was drawn to that one because of the markings on her face, and the volunteers there checked and yay for me she was a girl! So it worked out well.

I'll admit, yesterday afternoon once we got her home, and especially last night as I "slept" on the couch to help her get used to being in the crate without being all alone, I was wondering if I hadn't made a mistake. I'm not an impulse-buy type person, and she was fairly impulse (not really, but I think I'm generally more comfortable if I take some time and think about it before I buy most things). And last night I really, really missed Kebbie. I think that's part of why yesterday and last night was so hard, to an extent I wasn't expecting. It's just weird opening my heart up to another dog. I mean, Kebbie was special. I loved her so much. And we had her for most of my life that I can remember well. So it's weird getting used to a new dog. But then somehow, by the time I woke up this morning (from whatever sleep I managed to get last night, in between the frequent trips outside and such), she had managed to worm her way in. And she's so cute, and I'm so smitten now.

I discovered last night that she much preferred lying on my sandals than in her crate. Kinda gross if you ask me, especially considering I had been wearing those all day and forgot to take a shower yesterday. But maybe that's why. Anyway, it was cute, I have to admit. But then today someone in my family came up with the brilliant idea of putting those sandals into her crate to get her to want to go in there.

It worked. (That's a box in there to make the crate smaller than it actually is. If it's too big, she'll have enough room that she won't mind peeing or whatever in one end and sleeping in the other. If it's not too big, though, she won't want to mess in her sleeping space, just a natural thing. Who wants to sleep in their own waste?) Anyway. I wasn't excited at the prospect of losing my newish ND sandals, not that I minded her sleeping on them for now, but all day today I've been wearing this other pair of crappy $3 Old Navy flip flops that I was just going to throw out anyway, so now they have more of my smell on them, and seems to be doing the trick. We went out and got her a smaller crate (more of a travel crate) to put in my room for now so I don't have to sleep down here and she doesn't have to be alone at night while she's learning to hold her bladder. We stuck that pillow that's in the crate in the above picture (the tan-ish thing) into the new crate, and it's just big enough for that pillow to go along the bottom. I put the sandals I don't care about in there, and a T-shirt I had been sleeping in this past week (that was also in the other crate), and man she's really taken to the new crate. Which is excellent. Hopefully she'll sleep well tonight, and get up less frequently than she did last night. (I took away her water at 8 or so tonight, so that should help. I read that you should do that unless you want to be getting up a lot.)

For a bit of a size comparison. That's my hand. She's pretty small. Oh, I forgot to mention, she's apparently a Blue Heeler (Australian Cattle Dog) mix. Sort of makes people in this family slightly wary (we had some bad experiences with an Australian Cattle dog mix a few years back, my sister's dog), but she's a lot different than he does (or at least seems so at this point). She'll probably fairly more active than I'm used to in a dog, but I'm really looking forward to taking her hiking with me and such. So, good stuff hopefully. I just hope she has a good temperament, and is good with other people and the kids and stuff. She's great so far. But yeah. Anyway. Oh man, it's so cute, she loves ice cubes. She seemed like she wanted some water about an hour ago, and instead of giving her some I gave her an ice cube. Ice cubes + dog licking + linoleum floor = a good time. Eventually she got smart and picked it up and brought it into the crate, where the pillow would help keep the ice stable. So much fun to watch. She also ate three moths tonight. We've always been big on getting our dogs to eat moths, so that's good. She was really into it. So much fun.

Anyway. I really do have to go to bed. Remember, I have this job thing now. Crazy. Dad works from home most days so he'll be around to let her out and such. I'll probably have to come home on my lunch break some days here and there now, and maybe more later on, but yeah. Hopefully this will work pretty well for now. Aw she's so precious. It's so nice to have a dog in the house again.

Stay tuned

I have some exciting news. News that's even more exciting (to me) today than it was yesterday, when it happened. So. Be prepared, ok?